Monday, May 26, 2008

"ClassiC DefinitionS & CooL MeaningS"

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.

2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.

3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage

5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".

6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power ..

9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.

10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

12. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

20. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

21. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

22. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

23. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

24. Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.

25. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

26. Father : A banker provided by nature.

27. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.

28. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

29. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

30. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

31. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails......!

Belief in GOD, the almighty

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his
class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new student to stand and.....

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof: Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student : Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he
prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help
others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?

(Student is silent.)

Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start
again, young fella. Is God good?

Student :Yes.

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student : No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student : From...God...

Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in
this world?

Student : Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did
make everything.
Correct?

Student : Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred?
Ugliness?
All these terrible things exist in the world,
don't they?

Student :Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to
identify
and observe the world around you. Tell me,
son...Have you ever seen God?

Student : No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student : No , sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your
God, smelled your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception
of God for that matter?

Student : No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student : Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable,
demonstrable protocol,
science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you
say to that, son?

Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science
has.

Student : Professor, is there such a thing as
heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student : And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student : No sir. There isn't.

(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this
turn of events.)

Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even
more heat,superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or
no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees
below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that.
There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the
absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the
opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.

(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture
theatre.)

Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there
such
a thing as darkness?

Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the
absence of something. You can have low light, normal
light, bright light, flashing light.... But if you have no light constantly, you
have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness
isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't
you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young
man?

Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical
premise is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of
duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a
good God and a bad God.
You are viewing the concept of God as something
finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a
thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully
understood either one.
To view death as the opposite of life is to be
ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death
is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me,
Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural
evolutionary
process, yes, of course, I do.

Student : Have you ever observed evolution with
your own
eyes, sir?

(The Professor shakes his head with a smile,
beginning
to realize where the argument is going.)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the
process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this
process is an on-going endeavour, are you not teaching your opinion, sir?
Are you not a scientist
but a preacher?

(The class is in uproar.)

Student : Is there anyone in the class who has
ever seen the Professor's brain?

(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard
the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelled it?.....No one
appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of
empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,
sir. With all due respect,sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?

(The room is silent. The professor stares at the
student,
his face unfathomable.)

Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith,
son.

Student : That is it, sir.. The link between man &
god is FAITH. That is all that keeps things moving
& alive.

That young man was ALBERT EINSTEIN.......

Saturday, May 17, 2008

IMMAGINATION- A More valuable asset than experience

Imagination is nothing but a mental image perceived by the mind to create something extraordinary, it is something which leads the mind to think beyond, bearing no boundaries or restrictions.

The issue topic states that “imagination is a more valuable asset than experience”, i.e. when you think more, dream more, it paves a successful path to whatever one wishes to achieve.
Experience, on the other hand happens for a specific period, it makes one learn from an “event” that has occurred thus barring the human mind to ponder on other solutions, it just makes the mind to think pragmatically on the particular “happening” that has transpired.

The real display of imagination lies in the web of art, especially that of literature. As Shakespeare states, “ the poet’s mind is a fine frenzy rolling and glancing from heaven to earth, from earth to heaven, and as the imagination moves through a form of things unknown, the poet’s pen turns them to shape and gives to airy nothing; local habitation and a name such tricks hath strong imagination.

Imagination is more beautiful than reality as it embodies the idealism of man. For instance, the language of love exploits the mind to weave beautiful scenes to meet their loved ones. They create heavenly atmosphere in their mind which no poetry expression can depict. A classic example is that of “Romeo and Juliet”, one of the greatest pieces of literature.


Imagination also speaks volumes in great works like the Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, masterpieces in art like the The Taj Mahal, The leaning tower of Pisa and so forth. All these are nothing but a display of the artist’s strength of emotion, sincerity in work and immaculate clarity of their vision.


It also has its play in the field of politics. When India was under the siege of the British Empire it was Gandhiji’s vision of free India through “ahimsa” that finally led us to our independence.
The country’s first Prime Minister Jawaharlal Nehru laid down the basic principles of the Five Year Plans for the country. His initial blue-prints were the creation of his imagination for a new system in India, a country known for its diversity, rather than imitating capitalist countries like USA or BRITAIN or communist countries like CHINA or RUSSIA.

The charm of life does not lie in reason or logic alone; it however lies in fantasizing more or in other words “dreaming big”. Rules and norms hamper’s the mind to reflect beyond, thus making an individual pedantic at times. The realm of beauty in every piece of work is because of a “thought”, a “vision” and an “imagination” to accomplish it.
“Aim for the sky, you will reach the stars”.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Things only a mother can teach!

mother, teacher, learning


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4.My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
If I've told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Sunday, May 11, 2008

THINGS WHICH MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD! :)

1. Falling in love.

2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.

3. A hot shower.

4. No lines at the supermarket

5. A special glance.

6. Getting mail

7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.

8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.

9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.

10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.

11. Chocolate milkshake (or vanilla or strawberry!)

12. A bubble bath.

13. Giggling.

14. A good conversation.

15. The beach

16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.

17. Laughing at yourself.

18. Holding a newborn baby.

19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours.

20. Running through sprinklers.

21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.

22. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.

23. Laughing at an inside joke.

24. Friends.

25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.

26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.

27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).

28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.

29. Playing with a new puppy.

30. Having someone play with your hair.

31. Sweet dreams.

32. Hot chocolate.

33. Road trips with friends.

34. Swinging on swings.

35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger

36. Making chocolate chip cookies.

37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.

38. Holding hands with someone you care about.

39. Running into an old friend and realizing
that some things (good or bad) never change.

40. Watching the expression on someone's face
as they open a much desired present from you.

41. Watching the sunrise.

42. Getting out of bed every morning and
being grateful for another beautiful day.

43. Knowing that somebody misses you.

44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.

45. Knowing you've done the right thing,
no matter what other people think.

Friday, May 9, 2008

A tribute to Ramya

It was Jan 1st 2008. I was up all excited on the new year, a year i was eagerly awaiting as I was graduating in a couple of months and I felt a surge of independence rush through me. It was 11:00 am and I was suprised that one my best friends, Sweta hadn still called me to wish me a happy new year! Usually she's the first to wish me.Her mobile also wasn going and at that point i did get a tad bit worried. So I called up her place and to my worst fears, her mother informed me that Ramya and Anand were in CCU Apollo Hospital. I immediately called up my friend Divya and we both rushed to the hospital.It was one of the worst moments I had experienced. I saw my best friend and her family on New Year's day full of tears and worry. I didnt know what to say, I didn know what to do because the entire event seemed a blur to me.This is the incident which happened:

It was New Year's Eve and Hotel Savera had organized a party on a stage over a swimming pool. Due to overload the stage broke and people dancing on the stage fell into the water. Hotel Savera did not bother to call an ambulance. People were pulled out in random and the two of them were admitted in Apollo in the wee hours of the New Year. I still couldn register because I had spoken to Sweta, that night when she was at savera and also saw the incident late night on news after i arrived back from dinner with my family. I still could'nt co relate that it might be them.
7 days was filled with hospital visits, messaging, phones calls and lots and lots of prayers. All this couldn't save them. On 7th afternoon, as if it was spoken they both departed from us,first Anand and then Ramya.

The moment you hear the news heavy tone of your heart just feels like no, it couldn have happened. After you hear it you long for someone to shout that they were only joking.That exact moment while it lasts is the saddest moment in the world. That split second is all you need to recollect all the wonderful moments you have spent with that buddy. And now my heart felt like it couldn give space to any other emotion at all.

I have known Ramya since my school days, from my 12th standard end to be exact and that day I felt all those memories just flowing back to me. My first memory of Ramya was during TNPCEE hall ticket. Jalaja, Divya, Sadhana and I had gone had gone with Ramya's mother to get our hall tickets. I was introduced to this wonderful family and as more and more Sweta and I became closer I started becoming equally to her family as well.School days had those innocent fun! Those six months when we were vetti..we had spent the maximum time! Watching the match at my place, been like to every nook and corner of chennai and also had photo shoots! The photo was one memory I would never forget.One of our friends in the media line wanted us to pose for friendship's day and around ten of us had met isphani and had our shoot there. That was such a fun day!
Time flew and soon college started.. I still remember the first day, all five of us were in the same bus full of hopes and expectations as to what college would bring to us.Actually we each had different route of bus, but took the common route so that we could be together. Those journey's were so much fun! Arbit talks, raggin each other, sessions for Ranj , wat not?!
Ramya to me as a person was one of the best I knew. Her way of moving with people, making friends amazed me! She's one of those people i've never become close but somehow enjoyed every moment that i spent with her. All those combined studies from e-mech to math, all times spent with her family, all those late night conferences.. memories I will truly cherish. Ramya to me as been one of the biggest inspirer's as it was only through her i learnt to 'let things go'. To me that was a very important trait that I developed and changed in myself, cos change is somethin which people easily say but not so easy to actually do it, it takes lot of time and i should thank her for helping me develop it.It made me see a positive outlook in my life..! Every friendship has those moments of coldness and ours had too.. but one thing i repent is that I never told her that she meant a lot to me and she was of those few I truly liked. Now that she is in heaven blessing us, I am sure she knows it now.This is why I post this blog, a tribute to one of the best people i knew...

Ramya- a dutiful daughter, an amazing friend, a cherished companion and someone who made my college life complete in a cute way.Miss you.